There are cultures in the world where suicide is seen as an individual choice, a private matter, a somber affair to be wrestled within one’s own mind and sense of well being. This philosophy dates back to the Ancient Greeks who believed anyone could end one’s own life whenever he or she wanted, for any reason, at any age, no questions asked. Thousands of years ago, the humanity that formed Western civilization did not think suicide as the worst thing a person could do. They certainly did not consider it a sin. Maybe the collective thought was a shared empathy: Life is hard.
Long since B.C., Americans and Westerners do not agree with the Ancients or any society that condones suicide. We have grown to believe in the sanctity of life, something precious and God given, even divine. We agree that people should never end their lives no matter what. Suicide is not only terribly sad and confusing, it leaves an emotional scar on family and friends who wonder why and what if, who will carry the guilt while pondering anything they could have said or done to change the permanent outcome.
Ah, look at all the lonely people
Our nation’s suicide rate has increased 30 percent since 1999—close to 45,000 deaths in 2016, the highest number in decades. Which state has the highest suicide rate? Montana. The lowest? New York. Texas statistics reveal a large increase, too, but the highest incidents of suicide were in the northern Midwest states.
Suicide is the third leading cause of death among teens, second among 15- to 24-year-olds. The most likely to commit suicide besides youth are elderly white men. And suicide among the elderly, ages 65 and older, may be under reported by 40 percent, according to the American Association for Marriage and Family.
Every day 20 soldiers who’ve returned home from war overseas commit suicide. In other sobering statistics, gay youth are four times more likely to die of suicide. Guns are the most common method for males especially elderly; females, suffocation and poisoning, according to Suicide Prevention Resource Center. Half of those who died from suicide had diagnosed mental disorders; other reports set the figure at 90 percent. Such mental disorders, according to health.com, are depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, anxiety disorder, and personality disorders.
Other causes that lead to suicide are substance abuse; incarceration; family history of suicide; job loss; abusive relationships; terminal illness or debilitating health diagnosis; social isolation including bullying—this according to Healthline, an internet resource.
Warning signs of suicide, from mentalhealth.gov, are: talk of wanting to die, hopelessness, no reason to live, or burdening others; actively seeking a method; feeling trapped or enduring unbearable pain; and increased drug and/or alcohol use.
Suicide is so prominent that teachers and others who work with youth are trained annually on the signs of depression and suicidal thoughts in hopes of preventing a tragedy. Everyone assumes we should get involved. Still, suicide numbers rise.
That’s the thing: There are all of these resources … online … and yet we have this increasing traumatic intentional end of life—good lives, all worthy of living to full measure. But many have forgotten how.
Where do they all belong?
Organic reasons that may lead to suicide run the gamut from age to brain disease. When suicidal thoughts center on feelings of worthlessness, that life has no meaning and never will again, that is a sign of depression. In overcoming or dealing with depression, there are several options. “60 Minutes” broadcast journalist pioneer Mike Wallace was candid about his lifelong battle with depression and even suicide, feelings and thoughts amplified after the death of his son in the 1960s and again in the 1980s during a potentially ruinous libel lawsuit against him. But with constant psychotherapy and newer drugs, he lived—his later years perhaps more content than he’d ever imagined. He died of natural causes at age 93.
The Baby Boom generation may be another factor in increased depression and suicide. The way we were raised with instant gratification, embracing technology, and producing our own personal solitary confinement. Who wouldn’t be happy?
High tech has deluded more than one generation into thinking we are virtually independent beings. But we never stopped being human. We have forgotten to pursue first human connections, not crazy answers, blather and dubious history in the palm of our hands. We have to realize what it means to be human. We are emotional beings who think, not thinking beings who feel. Humans are no different from other mammals. A dog needs companionship. A person needs a person as we need one another and each other.
When it comes to contemplating suicide, there isn’t a human being on the planet who wouldn’t understand. Life has a lot of bitter than sweet, for some more than others or so it seems. Misery may be in the mind of the beholder. Talking about it helps. Writing about it can help, if another person reads it. Some people may have trouble bonding enough to feel secure to speak the unspeakable and seek help.
The late Anthony Bourdain, a consummate Baby Boomer, spoke of former drug abuse. He found living in the aftermath of addiction comes with a price. Some former addicts no longer experience an inner joy from just being alive. The feeling or lack of joy is just a scrambling of the brain’s pleasure sensors, and it may not be permanent.
Aside from severe mental illness, the reason for our society’s increased suicide rate has to do with an inner longing of the soul. Church and organized religion doesn’t work for everyone, certainly someone as sardonic as Bourdain and many of his generation. Yet there is an obvious missing link among the chronically depressed.
The search for something more to life than stuff has always been, from the ancients to modern man. The answer remains silent, buried deep in every human. It is the spirit, the thing that makes us human, that is wounded and needs addressing and healing. The search for inner peace makes life on earth an individual choice, a private matter, a somber affair to be wrestled within one’s own mind and sense of well being.
Please input the following as a smart phone contact: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255.