All I was doing was talking and laughing aloud in a line with my 2nd grade classmates. Then a teacher with tight lips, sprayed hair and buttoned-down dress stomped toward me in an instant meaning to stop the noise. She grabbed my arm and paddled me a few times on the butt. Whack. Whack. Whack. WaaaAAAAaaa!, was my little girl response as I recall. Looking back, what the hell?
In my school days, paddling was the ultimate corporal punishment. And through the years, I’ve been surprised to find that in Texas, it’s still legal. In this Texas Legislative session, a bill to ban the old 20th century practice was voted down. Texans, the wealthy ones that make all the rules every two years in Austin, like to think unruly kids need a good whack on their bee-hind. That’ll learn ’em.
[Shh. We’re not supposed to counter with studies that indicate corporal punishment only reinforces the behavior adults are trying to control—like, say, talking too much or smarting off.]
Ever since Dr. Spock’s post WWII book about taking care of babies and raising children, who were the Baby Boomers, modern American society has turned away from adult anger with kids that leads to cutting a switch from a tree, grabbing a belt or spatula or brush or paddle or trusty hand for spanking, hitting, whipping and hurting.
But now it appears to society most parents simply don’t have the stomach to discipline kids at all—not like our parents, teachers and principals of yesteryear. Is it loss of energy? Is it a consciousness of empathy? I hated it whenever a fellow kid got licks. Emotionally, I felt I was being hit, too. Still, today why aren’t more parents spanking or whipping their kids? Is it easy to ignore bad behavior? Do parents want their kids to be their friends? Kids who don’t know how to behave at home are going to get in trouble in school.
Society thinks kids are more and more out of line in public places. One little boy in a check-out line was inadvertently whipping me with a new belt. I tried to move away from his lashes but was trapped. He was hitting my bare legs in summer. I told him to stop, not wanting to make a scene. But he smiled, and I realized this was intentional. After another painful lash on my legs, I sternly used my adult chest voice at him to stop. That’s when his mother got involved and told me off. No reprimand for her son in a line of people using his belt as a whip. What the hell?
The current Texas Legislature countered the proposal to ban licks in our schools by claiming kids these days are way outta line, you know, with all the mass school shootins’ and other evil doins’. What those boys need is a good red bottom whereby when they try to sit down, they’d think twice about what they did to get licks. Texas, our Texas. How far behind, pardon the pun.
Gee, fellas, I don’t know. A kid, usually a teen, who would bring a loaded rifle or two to school and shoot everybody may have been the product of a violent upbringing. The bottom line is teens who are that angry (and really, suicidal) are dealing with mental illness, something they are incapable of comprehending and perhaps stopping or controlling. Whether their parents or principals whacked them in order to punish disobedience is not the issue at the heart of teen-age mass shooters.
Have paddle, Will travel
Teachers and administrators for the most part do not support corporal punishment. We’re trained that inflicting pain on a child who broke the rules is inappropriate in a civil society. [Hear that Texas Legislature?]
The Legislature’s ‘get tough’ policy to support corporal punishment on school children is nothing short of sick. An adult would have to be sick to hurt a child for disobedience. But we can’t agree on discipline. Yes, bad behavior by a child or teen who knows better must be dealt with and given a consequence. Paddling a teen at some point isn’t going to work. Any man will tell us this. They learn to be tough. They’ve built a resolve to not cry or let on like licks hurt.
Our Legislature cites the old Bible scripture ‘Spare the rod, spoil the child,’ and I’ve seen the point many times as a teacher. What I’ve seen are kids who know no meaningful consequence will come to them if they purposefully misbehave and break the rules. Detention is another consequence of the past. Parents have to be notified to arrange a day with the school when their child can do detention as a consequence for a string of misbehavior and disruption.
The issue of corporal punishment has been studied to death. It may work on some kids but not all, perhaps nowadays hardly any. And it’s pretty easy, Texas parents have found, to whip kids in anger and cross into child abuse. School teachers and administrators must report any marks, welts or injuries on students to Child Protective Services.
That, dear old Texas Legislature, is why our society has moved away from any physical discipline of children, even teen-agers. So, what to do with all the unruly, belligerent and incorrigible kids in our public schools? Mandatory parenting classes maybe, online, with refreshers every year? It is about time parents honor their responsibility to be consistent, instead of inconsistent, with their children, lay down the rules and administer fair consequences quickly. Love goes a long way in dealing with kids and teens. Still, some kids are going to want to be independent and push the envelope. They are each unique human beings.
Corporal punishment in the end reinforces the very behavior a disciplinarian wants to eradicate. Take me and all my childhood paddlings at school for talking too much. How did I end up? In the newspaper business for one—you know, the career where you blab to the world about everything? And column writing to boot. Which brings us to this here blog.